me stupid?

i was stupid to fall , stupid enough to kill myself,i didnt realized it would happen this way, i never thought i wouldnt happened the way i thought, it didnt happend the way i planned.
i dont usually plan, i just live on a day to day basis, but when i finally met her , i started planning, she put my miserable life back into pieces, shes my evrythin.
but dont know what happen and what is happening, i tried too much to save the passion, to save the love , but yet it seems not enough.
i tried and still trying to undertsnd her, but she never understand me.
i was mad and sad that is it happening to us, but then i realized sometimes what i did was wrong, sometimes i was a little harsh on her.and i realized that if you really love someone , you have to understand, you have to give patience in able to save the relationship.and thats exactly what im doin.
sometimes too much is tiring, but then again , i lve her so much, thats why im giving her to much patience,im juts hoping that maybe someday she will understand me, and even if it takes forver. i will alaways be here for her.
now what im pretty sure thing about myself is i love her so much..i did take risk , i risk everythin just to be with her, and yet it seems not enough, i gave my all of my time for her to make her happy, but then again she thought i spent too much of my time with my friends
sometimes i wanna fed up, but then loving her is still holding me back
and i know that when you love someone you have to undertsnd heryou to trust her,
i love her , i understand and i trust her,hope she felt the same way for me