letting go sint that easy

almost 2 weeks, and i was drowning in misery on the first week,
cant eat, cant take a bath, not even brushing my teeth,
dont know what to do, until i realized that its my life been ruining and she dont fucking even care,
what the hell im doin with my life?
i learned to let go of someone you can never have back, its not like the end of the world, theres a thin line between love and martyr.

i thought i have to start a new life, i have to face tomorrow alone,
and i thought i was already moved on,


until i realized just now, as in now, now that im dumbfounded here on my screen.
that i was just fooling myself, trying hard to be strong,
but the truth is shes still all over me, even i tried making myself really busy, shes still on my head,
i see her face everywhere, i cant get rid of her,
damn i still love her and i cant accept the fact the she already left me.
with the reason i don't still understand,
she told me she left me because she love me and she don't wanna hurt me anymore, WHAT THE FUCK! it was skeptical.
didn't she realized that she is hurting me more, , i just dont get the point,

she love me? but she has to leave me? what a great excuse to dump me,

i just want a little truth and honesty,
she could just simply spit on my face and told me that she fall out of love, and i will accept it with all my heart,
but instead she leave me those lies that makes me still hope.
why she cant just tell me the truth

why is she hurting me so this bad?
i still love her and ill do anything to have her back but i guess i really have to let her go if the feeling is gone.
but god. i swear i love her and i did everthing, i just dont understand why
god , god , god, thats the hardest thing to do, letting go of the one you really really love.

my heart is bleeding,
i cant let her go, i wont forget the moments weve been together
i dont know what to do, i wanna win her back,
go ahead call me bitter, you have no idea how hurt i am

i love her so much..... and i cant live without her